Here I am, about halfway through day #2 of life after the credit union. I have no profound insights, just a few little niggling realizations.
One realization is how diligent I have to be to keep up good habits during this period. I spent the past four months losing 16 pounds and got to a point where I feel pretty good. Actually, I was still thinking of trying to take off 4 more just for good measure, but I'm down two pants sizes and I feel well and I know I'm pretty close to where I want to be. But last night, what did I do? I kicked back with TWO rum-and-Diet-Cokes and about half a bag of Pepperidge Farm goldfish.
That is so pathetic on so many levels. First of all, if I was going to cut loose and do something wild and crazy, I'm thinking it should have been more glamorous or at least more FUN than Diet Coke and goldfish. Yeah, there was rum in there, but big whoop.) Second, it was evening -- a time of day largely unchanged by my change in job status. So why did I decide to lose control THEN? And finally, it really didn't make me particularly happy, so WHY?
Then today at lunch time I turned on the TV while eating my lunch. Big mistake. While there was absolutely nothing on worth watching, I still found myself unable to extricate myself until the end of the episode of What Not to Wear. I don't even like that show, I swear! So the bottom line is that I have to shore up my resolve to stay positive and productive and not fall into the easy traps.
I'm still trying to develop a new routine. I like the start of these two days -- get up, get the guys off, take my walk, eat breakfast and read the paper and then shower. And today, the next step was to go out to stores on the Nintendo Wii hunt. Word at Target is that if I'm there around 4 a.m. Sunday, I may be able to get one. And I'm considering it!
After the shopping trip I checked e-mail, where I had some well-wishes from people just hearing about my change, and sent some more e-mails to people I probably won't be seeing anymore with my job change. That brought me to lunch and the big sucking sound of the TV. When I finish here I plan to do my new Pilates DVD, then it's off to a parent-teacher conference at my son's school. Tomorrow I HAVE to do some major housecleaning, since we are entertaining here on Saturday night, and I want to get together a long household project list so that in the future I don't have to think of things to do, just go to the list and pick one.
I know that sooner than later, I also need to turn my attention to what I want to do for a living and start the process of finding something. But I think that will wait until Monday. It seems reasonable to me to give myself this whole week as a rest and recovery period.
Oh, before I go I have to give credit to Bob for one good insight. I can't remember how he said it, but it was great because it didn't sound mean or judgmental. But when I said something about getting up and starting the rest of my life, he reminded me that at least he isn't dead. (For readers who don't know, Bob's college roommate died suddenly and totally unexpectedly a few minutes past midnight on New Years.) It was a wonderful reminder of perspective -- compared to his roommate's widow, Sue, my problems look pretty small.